Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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