You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Come see our sink grown plant.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
