office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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