Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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