Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
