You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
