I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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