There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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