I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
