hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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