Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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