who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
