i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
