The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Randomize
