That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I wanna passion pit in your ass
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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