just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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