it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
