Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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