When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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