Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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