you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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