I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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