god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize