I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Randomize
