If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
