i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
