Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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