True but thats because hes a fetus.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
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