can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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