she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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