Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
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