we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
