I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
