Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Randomize
