ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
