We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
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