Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
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