Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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