He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize