two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
