id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
