As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
