Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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