Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
