He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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