Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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