Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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