just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
