He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
i think we sleep fucked last night...
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
