I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
